Discover The Secret High Tech Gadgets That Will Give You Mythic Status, Guaranteed!

Let’s cut to the chose here: we buy high tech gadgets based on who we want to be. That doesn’t mean we all buy the same stuff of course because we don’t all want to be the same person, which is good because I’m not sure how five billion different people of different races and genders could be the same person. But it does explain why 40ish men buy sports cars, why large women buy Hello Kitty backpacks and why my cousin Ray buys mascara and miniskirts.

Geeks, on the other hand, aren’t necessarily interested in power, sex appeal or anime cats. Rather we’re all interested in, let’s face it, mythic status. We want to be Jean-Luc Picard or Luke Skywalker or Aragorn. That’s why we choose avatars and chat room names like Obi_Wan72 and Mary_PoppinsXXX. (Right? Right???)

So, in the interest of time I present three high tech gadgets guaranteed to give even the weakest N00b instant legendary status, and without having to penetrate the depths of Myth Drannor to boot.

First up to bat is the Sidewinder Gaming Mouse. Got game? You do now; this customizable little baby has removable weights and 3 different kinds of feet to give you the perfect heft and weight as you hack your weight through yet another WoW labyrinth. You can even customize the laser sensitivity on the fly via dedicated hardkeys. This mouse works with you to keep your hand nimble well into that all-important 4^th hour of Microsoft Hearts: Ultimate Deathmatch.

Controlling your Halo pulse rifle with the Sidewinder is neat, but wouldn’t it be much cooler to hold a pulse rifle in your hands? These BFGs have the necessary heft and hardware to put a serious hurt on your Covenant enemies. Need some protection? You can also pick up your very own portable shield generator (“six units strong!”) to deflect the other guy’s energy weapons. If Han Solo had a pair of pulse rifles, Vader wouldn’t have had a chance!

But even the mighty pulse rifle pales in comparison to the best, most sure way to gain mythic status: the Ultimate Laser Pointer. This pen-style pointer has a unique triple lens system which covers three options: you can cast an underline, an arrow or a dot with a simple twist. Better yet, the dot has a range of 500 yards. That’s over a quarter of a mile (which is almost certainly farther than you job without taking a little breather). That’s right – no matter how large the auditorium, how high the balcony or how distant the rostrum, you can be virtually certain to paste your tiny dot of red light square in the teacher’s/executive’s/speaker’s eye. If that doesn’t gain you instant cred, the only remaining option is to go out and found a billion-